Slight Deviation

This humble blogger has been caught up in some strangeness lately, so the adventures detailed herein will be a tad different from those in my previous posts. For one, Erin left for the U.S. on Saturday morning and I've been alone all week. I enjoy my own company a great deal, but a full week alone without cats or colleagues to talk to is STRANGE. I had a number of plans for myself this week, nearly all of which were abandoned in favor of long walks, coffee, and afternoon wine with my crossword puzzles and journal. It was just simply a matter of waking up and saying, not today. 

I've also been watching things in the evenings like Vertigo, Miss Marple, and Janet Jackson videos on YouTube, but that's not important.

The laziness can be attributed to a baffling realization: for the first time since I was a kid, the only responsibility I have is to myself. I don't have a job to go to or anyone to look after. I do not need to consult with anyone about where to go, what to eat for dinner, or what to do. I have a great deal of time on my hands. I don't have any deadlines, and there are no expectations. This week, I do not even have the anticipation of Erin coming home from work and our usual routine.

Readers with children, please don't be mad at me. 

I fully appreciate the rarity and fortune of being in this position, with all of my health, in a truly beautiful place I never imagined I'd see in my lifetime. I've spent so many years planning, striving, building, working, and adapting that the truth of this situation has taken a little time to sink in. As someone who is usually super hard on myself and who has all kinds of expectations about what I should be doing with my time and how to make it meaningful, it's kind of amazing to take a step back and appreciate things exactly as they are, and that's what I've been doing with my simple, quiet days here in Sweden this week.

A more typical post will resume next week, but I'm taking this week off to reflect on how lucky I am, enjoy the sun and the sea air, and listen to music that makes me happy.